(Edited 11/28/2023)

Some of you can imagine a time where you shared a space with someone that demanded your emotions to remain hidden. Some of you may still share that space with them, like I do.

They may make comments about you laughing at something, anything citing joy. But silencing your rage is high on their hit list.

It’s as if the oppressor either doesn’t want that for you, or risk having it directed to them. When in reality, they’re making it easy for that judgment to sit on their name, despite their best toxic efforts.

This attempt of control can lead to damaging thoughts if they’re not cared for properly. And if they don’t want you to feel anger about anything, what good are words to them stating that what they’re doing is wrong?

Distance really is the best option for people like this.

They will say anything they can to keep you on their leash, but even they have to know that once you’ve declared how fed up you are, there’s no stopping how you feel. Now you’re just redirecting the anger made from them never willing to change, and using it to change (their role in) your life.

If they can’t handle your feelings, if they’d rather you be a doll or a punching bag for their insecurities, then they have to prepare for the day you limit or deny them any access to you.

They can be as angry as they want to be about that future. It’s the only form of it they wish to exist, compared to yours. And chances are, it’s why they’ll earn the right to be alone in their pain.

It may be the only way they’ll step up to making amends and hold themselves accountable for why you’re in a constant fury, especially when/if you’re around them.

Meanwhile, whatever makes you angry about them, acknowledge it. Your experiences are real, and they are yours to learn how to be better than them from each event.

One way or another, they’ll either regret hurting you this way and change, or regret quietly and move onto the next “punching bag.”

From there, the best way to hit them back is from a safe distance, and the success made while keeping it.

D.F.