Sometimes a person wants you to “stay in a child’s place” because they may not have healed from their own childhood.

They might want you to stay as obedient, quiet, and submissive as they were to please people that are no longer here.

You are their single or collective pressure point for things you weren’t responsible for. A dumping ground, a punching bag for unresolved pasts.

That doesn’t excuse them, and you’re in your right to (not) forgive in any form you’re comfortable with.

But maybe there is a way to stay in a child’s place without fitting that limiting definition. Or better yet, protecting that place.

Somewhere in your youth may lie a touch of pure, unconditional joy and love. Where you felt free to express yourself without being torn away from what makes you smile. The older you get, the better your chances that you learn how to defend and nuture that innocence. Often with help, and chances are, you are no longer deflecting your pain to anyone.

It will get messy in the defense, but healing and thriving isn’t without its dirt, bruises, and scars to remind you of why you survived.

So if you are old enough to so much as pay bills, curse your receding hairline, and even count the grays in what’s left of it, give your younger self the care and compassion that we still deserve as an adult.

If you are already a parent that shows their child or children love opposite of the turmoil you faced, keep going.

The world needs more of us at all ages, through time and spirit.

D.F.