Category: Uncategorized

“Freestyle Day”

July 31st, 2024

There’s a phrase that I’ve heard a few times, that if someone doesn’t like you, check their bank account and see if it’s affected.

I never liked it because it can justify treating others like they’re above judgement and accountability.

As long as that isn’t compromised they have no regrets in stepping on people to maintain whatever status they have. Even the ones they say they love, so long as they don’t blow the whistle on them.

I can even relate it to the mutation of the phrase “the customer is always right in matters of taste.”

The first part of it is often used by people who demand that their needs must always be met. It’s possible so long as they’re the loudest and most silver-tongued person in the room.

Neither types don’t care about any damage they cause so long as they gain the control or income they receive. Even the other phrase, “a fool and their money are soon parted,” doesn’t matter.

Victory is a drug, but so is playing the victim when they don’t get their way or lose it in a private or public space.

At that point, the audience who knows better than to be that way will feel the same as those affected by their behavior. Saying “oh well” to them the way they did to the people they took down to sit on their self-made throne.

Or in deeper cases, their high castle.

-Kingston Priest
Overdue Update and New Project Announcement

July 26th, 2024

So life has been adventurous these last few weeks. In life, romance, jobs, and in art.

The last one even more thanks to a project I started late last month, titled “The ABC’s of Being a POS.”

As you can tell, this is not far from what I’ve been talking about on here. This is an attempt to be more satirical about toxic behaviors, even at the risk of inspiring certain people to up their game.

It’s also one that I’ve decided to post both on here, and in video format.

The video one is what’s taking the most time because of a mix of perfectionism and readability for those in need of it.

But even in this I’m reminding myself that getting the message out is more important than its presentation.

Doing this feels similar to how most Japanese manga sets the stage for their anime adaptations. Like that example, there will be slight differences between the blog and video versions, but still aiming to drive the main point of the project home.

The blog versions will debut next month. Just in time for the two-year anniversary of the blog, itself. Looking forward to making it happen 🙂

– Kingston Priest
The Bear

May 6th, 2024

The past few weeks have been showing many people’s opinion about the bear versus man debate.

If you are not familiar with it, there is video of a man asking random women on the street if they would feel safer with a man or a bear in the forest. With women answering bear, it has sparked a large debate on mostly two sides: the women and femme presenting sharing stories why they would not choose men, and the men whose responses prove why women would choose the bear.

Two bears, in one person’s case.

It’s not to say that there aren’t men who would also choose the bear, and while their reasons can be similar to any woman’s experiences, there are others I have considered.

There are men out here who at several points in their life knew they were the reason the bear was always a safer choice, long before this question started.

Men who, despite their progress in being better people, they are still occasionally haunted by who they were, no matter how long ago they had acted in any way that makes them shudder now.

It is fine to believe that to feel shame for past actions is proof of growth. But we also live in a world where allegations alone have become synonymous with a guilty verdict.

Men healing from their old selves have a right to feel scared about exposure when they consider that. Those who reflect even deeper may fear victims coming forward years later and naming them for what they’ve done. Whatever comes to that may vary, but it should not stop said man from continuing to be better than who they were.

Of course there are those men who do not have a history like that to reflect on, but they still have experienced enough to know how to treat women better. How to be the solution, and not the statistic.

While it’s clear for many that other men dismissing women’s answers and claims should do better, too many societies are not built to define “better” as something worth being for the sake of compassion or even altruism towards others.

As people, it is up to us to not add to anyone’s suffering. But as men, it is up to us to call out the insensitivity towards any woman’s boundaries and history.

Anything less is why the bear deserves to be chosen.

D.F.
Ally

May 1st, 2024

Why do I care?

Why do I care so much about the rights of other people that live differently from me?

People who identify in a way that may contrast one’s outer view of them?

People who are guided by who their heart calls to, no matter how society want to suppress them?

When one’s choices aren’t a threat to another, when a person chooses an identity that is a break from “traditions,” when I am in a place to respect how a person chooses to show up in life the way I wish to be respected, I ask in return…

Why shouldn’t I?

Who am I to tell a stranger, or even someone close to me, who they should be when their choices are not a threat to myself or anyone?

Who am I to support, suggest, or make a law against people whose only crime is that their right to choose hurts those that profit off their distress?

Being an ally to anyone outside of one’s choices takes many forms. Whether it’s by your upbringing, or even choosing to be better than who you were, your presence is appreciated by them.

Just as much as theirs can be by you.

D.F.
Progress Report: Being Praised When You Least Expect It

April 10th, 2024

When you feel like you’re not doing enough to show how progressive you are about your present and future, someone or something will remind you without warning. That’s often the best way for me.

I used to be the one that would fish for compliments and adoration so heavily, it became one of the things I had to unlearn.

Yes, I’ve done it in rare times on social media, but what I’ve put out there of myself is my own proof that I’m worthy. Not just of one thing or several, but period.

That’s why it means more when so much as a positive meme comes from a reliable, and safe source. A friend, or family by blood or spirit, and even a romantic partner. Those are among the sources that we can relate to who can support what we’ve come to know is true in our own hearts.

Take any bit of time you can in your day to cheer on someone you care for. Let them know that their progress is being recognized and supported, even from a distance. You never know who needs that, even if they move as if they don’t. We all do.

D.F.
Breaking

March 29th, 2024

I shared this image on social media today, and while it can deserve my own follow-up to it, a friend had replied by saying “sad thing is you can’t until you have been shattered.”

It took a moment to write, but I ended up saying the following:

“I see the point about it being sad that you have to go through that first, but look at how many people get shattered and stay that way because they feel that’s either all they deserve.

Some people try to get close and get hurt, and the broken person could care less because misery loves company. They even surround themselves with people that will enabled the laid-out pieces, even celebrating that they are there for a number of twisted reasons.

Then you got the other people that can sweep the pieces up and glue them back together. Sometimes with personal and professional help. The broken art won’t be what it was, but a lot can be learned and shared about the journey of putting it back together. Learning how to make sure the pieces don’t hurt old and new people that want to help you reform, because they see how you are doing it for yourself, and not for clout or attempting to pull someone.

That way you look at the parts that can’t or don’t fit with what’s been restored, and be good with what has and will replace them.”

As of this posting they have not responded yet, but for the most part I feel good about what was said, and just like the rest of this blog, comes from personal accounts. So I guess I am ready to talk with many more people the way the source material suggested.

D.F.
Shout: Sharing Your Joy in the Face of Oppressors

March 27th, 2024

Sometimes it feels like your happiness should not be shared to the world.

The broader the announcement, the greater the threat it can be to that declaration.

That can come from a history of people in your present and past life that may take that happiness and “punish” you for finding it.

Reasons can include that you found it outside of their provisions and conditions, or their beliefs that your purer definitions of happiness do not match theirs.

Jealousy and envy comes in different and surprising forms. The longer you abide by the rules of people that feel it, the harder it seems to reveal your passions. Especially with those who act like they have emotional leverage over you.

Then comes a point where you say “yes, I deserve this, and it’s time people know that I do, no matter how they feel about me.”

Whatever that announcement may be, know that for every person who celebrates you, the others will either be repulsed away, or try to stick around to see how long that feeling lasts.

The second part reminds me of what’s said about anger towards someone, where they’re drinking poison hoping it hurts the other person. Double for those who can not admit their own faults that created the hate for you.

Declare your happiness. It’s okay to be scared of who or what tries to take it from you based on what you’re still healing from. The people responsible for that history will avoid exposing their hate until it hurts them. Being aware of it should never hurt you so much that you don’t believe that you deserve that happiness. Even if you do still wish to keep it secret and safe.

You always have.

D.F.
The Golden Child: Protecting Your Youthful Self.

March 15th, 2024

Sometimes a person wants you to “stay in a child’s place” because they may not have healed from their own childhood.

They might want you to stay as obedient, quiet, and submissive as they were to please people that are no longer here.

You are their single or collective pressure point for things you weren’t responsible for. A dumping ground, a punching bag for unresolved pasts.

That doesn’t excuse them, and you’re in your right to (not) forgive in any form you’re comfortable with.

But maybe there is a way to stay in a child’s place without fitting that limiting definition. Or better yet, protecting that place.

Somewhere in your youth may lie a touch of pure, unconditional joy and love. Where you felt free to express yourself without being torn away from what makes you smile. The older you get, the better your chances that you learn how to defend and nuture that innocence. Often with help, and chances are, you are no longer deflecting your pain to anyone.

It will get messy in the defense, but healing and thriving isn’t without its dirt, bruises, and scars to remind you of why you survived.

So if you are old enough to so much as pay bills, curse your receding hairline, and even count the grays in what’s left of it, give your younger self the care and compassion that we still deserve as an adult.

If you are already a parent that shows their child or children love opposite of the turmoil you faced, keep going.

The world needs more of us at all ages, through time and spirit.

D.F.
Love Takes Time: The Patience in Finding Romance

March 13th, 2024

Darling.

Sweetheart.

Terms of endearment that I have received from even staff members in different places. But even in older seasons, and under uncomfortable habits, I don’t think I’ve ever called anyone I had a relationship with words like that.

Recently, that has changed.

Granted, I am still declared single, and we are friends on the surface, but for some time now I have gained a mutual love interest that is the most unique one yet.

Unique because of its origins, circumstances, and even the most surreal similarities.

Recently we have discussed the chance of becoming official despite our distance from each other. A very small group of friends know of the matter, and I surely talked about this with my therapist.

But I think what matters the most is that this is proof of the power behind being patient for a version of love that I always believed in, but wasn’t ready for with who I was prior to this.

There are other factors that we have repeatedly discussed in our time together. Even in our rougher moments, we’ve come to a point where they may not matter anymore. We are eager to discuss this further in person, to know for sure that we want to go to the next level.

Maybe we will or won’t. Even if we are meant to be with completely different people in the longer run, the patience and maturity built up between us will be beneficial for a lasting and purer love than we’ve ever had prior to us.

I look forward to seeing what’s next.

D.F.
Pain and Gain: Facing the Hard Truths for a Better Life

March 1st, 2024

Thinking of making Fridays a day to start sharing quotes that I get from random sources throughout my week. Whether it’s from scripted or unscripted material, there’s always something to pull from it, starting with this:

“We don’t have to be afraid of our pain. We just have to decide what we’re going to do with it.”

Jet, from Avatar: The Last Airbender (Live-action)

The blog running for as long as it has is a great example of that.

What good were all the frustrations and other rough emotions doing for me just staying bottled in?

Choosing this path over other ones has helped communicate things that were always in me, but weren’t as easily accessible because I had to bury myself out of decades of every bit of emotional mess that I often put myself in, as well as held on to longer than I should have.

Not saying that some of it isn’t still there, but it’s gotten better to remind myself how to channel it to posts like this, and other actions even offline.

Take time to notice the moments where you’ve converted pain into the things, and be around people that make you the most comfortable. Then celebrate yourself for being free enough to move forward, or having been free from the kinds of trouble that held you back for too long.

Enjoy your weekend 😊

D.F.