Tag: boundary

Control

October 4th, 2023

This is inspired by some recent advice I got about an active event. Same could be said about most of my past posts, and even this one could be more of a remix to past ones. Which is okay, because it’s clearly still a thing.

There will be a point when people that you’ve removed from any type of connection will try and re-establish something with you. That FOMO feeling coupled with the hopes that you forgive and have forgotten why the cut off or restrictions happened in the first place.

There may be some cases where you will and are able to hold the line. I love those.

Other times, you may have to make the reconnection exist, if only to stop it from causing more drama than what started the previous cut. Especially if you’ve chosen to be cordial in person, but never as close as you used to be.

If at all.

It’s not like they would do anything stupid again to earn your wrath for the last time, right?

Well, if they surprised you with their frequent disrespect before, and you both know that they did it, you may as well be ready for it, as they should be ready for more of your undeniable receipts.

Whichever side you lean to, don’t lose sight on the things that you have grown towards, and who you have grown with in their absence.

The others may express some jealousy coupled with guilt tripping, but they got what they earned.

But it’s nothing compared to what you earned without them.

D.F.
Down Low

March 27th, 2023

There is a certain depth that I reach when I’m done with someone’s nonsense. It’s one that others have subjected me too many times because of who I was.

A tiny few have reconnected because of then-proposed and later confirmed growth, but it’s the others that maintained a distance that I draw deeper knowledge from.

Even before my mental health journey began, I had moments of being done with people. Either telling them in private messages, blocking, or the one time to someone’s face.

That depth seems to strengthen with each time, which is a good thing.

Sometimes it was scary. At first because it was new, and given other emotions that I had to wall up to spare others, I was unsure how to control it. Now, I see it like a program running in the background, updating itself with each new account of threats to the entire system.

How they feel about me cutting them off or limiting exposure is their fight, just as much as it is for those you’ve cut ties with. To do that with people that are “danger close” to you does warrant cautiousness, so long as you don’t lose the desire to do so when that distance is established.

D.F.

Tag: boundary

Control

Down Low