I wish I could say that all the posts that I make often contain callbacks to the original set that started the entire blog. But it’s appearing differently.

There are notes I’ve noticed get repeated in certain ways, and I like to believe that it’s because of how deep the pain is behind them. I noticed this after I posted my latest entry, where it had a connection to a section that was primarily dedicated to my parents, and others like them.

And while it was initially helpful to release a lot of that, the repetition of that speaks loud to how the healing comes in waves, and takes time to learn how to ride them.

Even repeating the fact that your personal growth and healing is more important than any energy you have put into them will always hit deeply.

Maybe it’s because I’m close to four years into being something that I was living as in these last few decades.

It will be easier to manage through time, but the distance from everything that continues to exist here will make it better.

Boundaries will be strengthened; words won’t be sugar-coated or spared as heavily as they are right now.

As my therapist even mentioned, there’s plenty of things that deserve to be said, but I’m in no place to rock the boat just yet. In making this blog, it’s nice to know that I’m the one controlling these particular waves.

I’ll do my best to keep them calm and carry on.