There was a time where the New Year was a chance to mentally cleanse yourself of the things and people you gained or want distance from. When some of those are family related, it gets harder to navigate around.

You can love your sibling but are disgusted by their partner for how they’ve talked to you.

Your parent(s) can continue to associate with people they’ve complained to you about, and you’re “forced” to be cordial with in specific settings.

Some of your extended family can even vary between distrust and uncertainty.

The time you’ve taken to heal and recount the trauma and stress from all of it can have your boundaries, and wavering filters make you look like a villain in their eyes.

And when they’ve repeatedly proven that they’re beyond accountability, or when they delete offensive comments made directly about you, they wonder why you’ve limited or denied them access.

Most may even wonder why they don’t hear “I love you” back in the same strength as them. Not when their version of the phrase is set to excuse them of any judgment, and yours is said to keep an uncomfortable peace.

The New Year always deserves a better introduction. One that helps you celebrate what you’ve done to recognize the painful patterns, and why to continue refusing its adoption.

Even if you’re like me, and once served as a continuation of those pains, know that while they can’t be returned to sender, they can be recycled.

Why else would I be five consecutive months into this blog?

D.F.