For those that observe Thanksgiving, how did you do?

Did you center yourself in the mix of any dog whistles and passive aggression?

Did you have any awkward silence with visiting family?

How many personal questions did you graciously dodge?

And if these questions are reminiscent of the barrage of ones received, my apologies.

This time of year brings out the strongest personalities to pick at people they declare weak. I’ve lost count how many times I’ve said that their opinions don’t matter, but there is something I had to remind myself of.

Some people went though something dark, maybe even repetitive. Something to make them think that their loved ones deserve to be talked to like broken toys or obedient pets, in a way they may have before you were even born.

They constantly seek adoration they never had. Power and control they always wanted, but was pushed onto them or stripped from them. If any of that is true, not only is it not their fault, it’s not your fight to take on so they can heal from it all.

You’ve made the steps needed to focus more on your generational strengths more than curses. Steps inspired by events outside holiday gatherings, where the toxic can prey on the healthy. The healthier you look, the harder they’ll try.

Remind yourself in those moments that you become stronger as they push and pull on your weaknesses. If it comes to a point where you reveal that to them, especially in the heat of a moment, I wish safety onto you.

This is a year-round battle we’re fighting here. You’re allowed to declare victory even before you see it yourself.

And you’re allowed to tasted it much sooner than the leftovers that will be breakfast and more for the next few days 😉

D.F.