How long have you been somewhere that you grew out of before you finally found a way out, or they found a way to get you out?

For reasons that are confidential, I was released for my job on the 21st, a Friday. After nearly three and a half years, my body didn’t fully feel the effects of the loss until Monday.

But after that and other matters were taken care of, I took advantage of the free time to do a lot of cleansing which I either never had the time for, or didn’t make time for.

And when I say cleansing, I don’t just mean in the physical level. There were energies and mentalities that were a mix of non-work related matters, and the fact that I knew in my heart that I had outgrown the place. I wasn’t the only one feeling that way, but that’s their stories to tell.

Options on where to go had been presented in ways that were helpful because of the job. But the work that I have been doing on myself with this blog, various avenues of support from the trustworthy, and just overall not giving up on myself which included allowing myself to rest, all of it is key towards the better place that I always knew I belonged.

Now as I say all of this, there is little to no bad blood with the people there. They had a job to do, and so did I, even on the way out.

The closest I could come to saying anything rude about some members is that I was aware of pending investigations with those unrelated to me and my status. But that’s their fight, that’s their burden, and that’s their karma.

The same could be said for the events leading to my departure. But taking it in stride and with respect for myself and the former associates spoke more about my character than any notes about my time there ever will.

As for what’s next? Something better, something fitting to the decades of creative skills I’ve attained, mixed with the ones that started and rediscovered when this blog began.

There were many good, enjoyable, and educational moments throughout my time with them. But deep inside, I’m sure enough people knew I was meant for more than what the place could, or would have wanted to offer.

It also took me to realize that, as well, and stick with it, as I have in various ways.

Because of that line of thinking, that’s what made me say the following to a friend: “Quitting meant that I found something. Getting fired means that something found me.”

There are ways that can be expanded on on a case-by-case level, but it goes back to what I said before, that another friend even felt glas that I took this transition in stride.

It’s not without the anxieties that can come up and down before the next position. Some of them inspired by those who have their own financial insecurities before harping about my own.

This time, however, feels very different.

This time there’s experience, assurance, and faith that this will be the last time I ever have to face this kind of event. Because before, those 10 months before being hired by this last position, which were also the catalyst for me starting this blog and my mental health journey, I was in search out of desperation. Now there’s a  matter of clarity towards my destination. One that I thought I didn’t deserve or didn’t believe was within reach.

That’s not the case, anymore. I can and will only go up from here.

K.P.